Thinking about Dr. Brown, she couldn’t help but remember her recurring nightmare. The nightmares were different and yet they were very similar. Dr. Brown attributed them to her traumatic past, and he was probably right. Her father had been a drunk and verbally abusive to both her and her mother although her mother took the brunt of it while she hid in her bathroom trying not to hear. One night, the yelling was really bad, so she ran down there to try to stop them. She found her father on top of her mother beating her up. Before she knew it, she had jumped on top of her father’s back trying to pull him off or at the very least distract him. Her father then threw her to the ground and turned around. She had not known if he would hit her as well, but he turned and left the house. The very next day our bags were packed, and her and her mother moved in with her mother’s parents.
For a time, she was happy and had family around. She felt safe. For her 8th birthday, a huge party was thrown with all sorts of family and friends. Everyone was having such a fun time then her father showed up. He started yelling and screaming. She ran into the house and hid in the basement then she heard gun shots and screaming. Cecelia looked out the little window that looked into the backyard and saw people running then falling to the ground. When she saw her father, she ran into one of the closets and hid and did not come out for a long time. Not even when she no longer heard screams or gunshots, or when she heard sirens and people calling out for survivors. It might have been only hours or days until someone finally found her. They said she was in shock. If that was the case, then she was still in shock to this day. Some have said that her father had looked for her to try to kill her, but when he heard the sirens, he gave up and shot himself. There was no note, no reason for why he did this.
Unfortunately, there are some things that would never have an explanation, and the survivors of such horror just had to find a way to move on. Something, she was still trying to do. Looking into the world’s past was a lot easier than looking into her past. Perhaps, it had more to do with the fact that the world, like her, was also imperfect with scars. Yet, there was still hope. With every new discovery, a little more was learned about the worlds past then perhaps this knowledge could be used to ensure that the past does not repeat itself, so the world can heal at last or at least not get any new wounds. She was not a psychiatrist, but she certainly has seen enough of them in her life that she was starting to dissect things the way they do. Just then the coffee maker beeped. Ahh, her coffee was ready. It would help push away the dark thoughts.